It was brought to my attention not so long ago that there are different, classifiable women. Yea, that sounds obvious, but there is apparently an easy way to classify women to determine if they are a match for you. Each woman has a set of personality traits that make up who they are in relatively easy to understand models. We are going to go over these different traits and combination of women and see which type of woman is right for me. This is long so this post will be split into four parts. One post for each trait and then all of the combinations. Let the fun begin!
Time Line: Tester vs. Investor
Simply put – a Tester prefers to date multiple men simultaneously, and an Investor is VERY uncomfortable doing so and prefers to focus all of her efforts on one single guy. You could say that a Tester can be attracted to many guys at once, but an Investor is not. The Test / Invest element is the most fluid and most easily able to change of the three character dimensions. It can change gradually with age, but also depends on her individual dating experiences.
Tester:
It’s all about emotional diversification. She doesn’t want to put all of her eggs in one basket. Most likely it comes from being hurt in the past – romantically. So she tests. She keeps men on the side. She flirts heavily and leads guys on.
What’s important is the understanding behind WHY she does these things. Many people think that women date many guys at the same time in order to figure out which one is the PERFECT guy. And they’re wrong. In fact the Tester does NOT really even CARE about finding ONE perfect guy. She is getting the total package by getting certain types of value and emotions from the combination of guys. If they are young, they are simply thinking “I’m just having fun for a few years and then I’ll find someone to settle down with later.” Surprisingly, within those few years, even if they find that perfect one, they might still date others who are not as good as him.
I’m going to generalize a little bit – and this isn’t the case 100% of the time, but in general a Tester has suffered some kind of romantic loss where she has felt cheated and betrayed by a guy in the past. A TESTER dates multiple guys to feel significance – to be validated as a desirable, attractive woman. And this is VERY important to women. One of the girls who I met doing this actually dropped out of college for a YEAR and is now a year behind so she could move into the city and SERIOUSLY date men full time – and on average was dating 8 guys at once – all of which were completely clueless. She would treat all 8 of them pretty well – so they all thought they were the only one.
Investor:
So while a Tester is indifferent to really finding that one “perfect guy” an Investor DOES have getting the perfect guy in the back of her mind.
However – it’s not that she finds the perfect guy and then decides to stick with him – it’s that she is trying to FIX him. She sees that he has potential. The guy has POTENTIAL to be perfect for her. And that is what keeps her devoted to him.
She will usually have ONE THING she is trying to “change” so that he becomes perfect for her. But here’s the kicker – once she does get him to change that one thing – her interest usually goes right down the tubes.Because for her – the feeling of having something to work on, something to “fix” is what keeps her interested and attracted. That will play heavily into our in depth strategies for attracting an Investor.
Investors make GREAT girlfriends – that much is true. And well, Testers can be a lot of fun, but if you want to change them into an Investor, that is going to take a different strategy – which we’ll discuss later in the program.
What’s even more interesting is that an Investor will stay with a guy until she is CONVINCED he is not the one. The key word – being convinced. She usually has to be convinced BEYOND A SHADOW OF A DOUBT that he is not the one. And if she is convinced, she will move on to the next guy, sometimes with a testing small phase of in between them.
An Investor has also suffered some kind of romantic loss – but does NOT feel cheated or betrayed – either she had to move away from a guy she really loved, or lost him in some other way – OR and this is a big one – blames HERSELF for the loss.
What Do I Need?
I definitely need an Investor. I need fixing ladies. I need one girl to stick with me and work with and see the good. Yes, there is the possibility that she may leave once I’m fixed…but let’s be honest, that’s never happening. I have a ton of good things going on for me, but I have a mountain of flaws that a woman could fix. I say that partly in jest, but it also holds some truth. However you take it, I feel I am most compatible with an Investor. For those who have read this blog before, do you agree? Disagree? Why or why not? Next Monday we’ll go over the next phase of Pandora’s Box.
Come here, sit next to me for a second. Can I be blunt?
I WANT TO SLAP YOU IN THE LEG SO HARD RIGHT NOW, DANGEROUSLY CLOSE TO THE ‘NADS SO YOU FEEL IT, BUT NOT AS BAD AS YOU WOULD IF I STRAIGHT UP NADDED YOU.
Nadded isn’t even a word. But it should be a hard, painful word.
Back on target. You don’t need fixing. Or, if you do, that’s all in your control, not some Investor. Additionally, consider that an Investor probably has some sort of element of herself that needs fixing, which is why she likes fixing other people.
Here’s hoping it isn’t her botched male to female surgery that needs fixing.
Please don’t nad me. I guess I don’t really need to be fixed per se, but my edges need to be smoothed. Just think of me like that 87 carat diamond that has yet to be polished.
Everybody needs a little fixing. It’s how you approach it with your partner that makes the most meaningful sense. I know I’m an investor, and I don’t think my BF of almost 10 years thinks that my wanting to fix him is a bad thing. And the same goes the other way, I know there are things that my BF wants to fix about me, and we take this information with us wholeheartedly in building up our relationship for the better. Almost like we’re just trying to perfect each other as much as possible for the future possibility of having kids and raising a family, or hell, even just being a robust couple that can handle anything that’s thrown at us. At least that’s who my BF and I view courtship. Perhaps this is different for others.
where’s the rest??! It’s Friday!
I’m usually a big fan of you and you know it. But this post makes you kinda sound like a dick.
You characterize both “types” as being somehow broken and damaged. You sound like that jerk that I went on a date with Monday night talking about what is wrong with women.
I hope the whole series doesn’t continue like this.
Oh, And I wrote that comment before reading the last paragraph because I was so annoyed.
You don’t want to be fixed. You want to find the lady who accepts who you are.
Where is the “type” for women who want a long term relationship, don’t want to fix or be fixed, just want to find the person whose flaws are compatible with her own?
@brandy what are you talking about…it says Monday
@brooke I should have made a note that I didn’t write the definitions of Tester/Investor or any commentary. Actually, now that I think of it, this appears to be blatant plagiarism. College boy forget to cite his source.